Why to take yourself on solo dates
Making a habit of taking yourself out for some solo time imparts benefits for your mental health and wellness. According to therapist Melissa Divaris Thompson, LMFT, going on solo dates can help you get to know yourself better by offering space and time to introspect and connect with yourself and your emotions, which in turn increases your self-awareness and understanding of yourself. What’s more, actually having the courage to go out alone and be your own entertainment and company helps you build your independence, she says, which in turn can boost your self-confidence.
“These are [outings] where you put yourself and your needs first, and it can also be relaxing and enjoyable at the same time.”—therapist Melissa Divaris Thompson, LMFT
Beyond those benefits, taking yourself out on solo dates is an act of self-care. You’re the one in charge of the date from beginning to end, so it’s all on your terms—no compromising or accommodating another person’s desires, just catering to your own. “These are [outings] where you put yourself and your needs first, and it can also be relaxing and enjoyable at the same time,” says Divaris Thompson.
Her only tips for solo daters? Pick activities you really want to do, not what you think you should be doing. So how do you actually figure out what to do?
For more on solo dates and their benefits, listen to the “Table for One” episode of The Well+Good Podcast:
How your zodiac sign can help you find your ideal solo date
Each sun sign, which corresponds to your birthday, is imbued with specific traits based on its characteristics that inform its likes and dislikes. For example, Taurus is sensual and passionate in part because of its element, earth, but the influence of its ruling planet Venus injects the practical bull with a love of luxury, comfort, and fun.
When looking for your next solo date idea, focusing on your sun sign gives a glimpse into “what each zodiac sign would actually enjoy doing, what would be beneficial to them, and what would make them feel happy,” says Alexandria Lettman, astrologer and founder of spiritual-wellness platform Jupiter Jewel.
Find your zodiac sign below, and read on for insights from Lettman and Stephanie Gailing, astrologer and author of Astrology: An In Focus Workbook: A Guide to Understanding Yourself Through the Sun, Moon, and Stars, about the star-sanctioned solo date you should plan next.
Your ideal solo date, according to your zodiac sign
You like to always be in motion, Aries, so a fun time out alone will need to incorporate that. Channel your fiery and active nature into some physical activity that’ll get your adrenaline pumping, such as rollerblading, surfing, or horseback riding. Gailing recommends trying “something where you’re moving, sweating, and really channeling that fire.” If it’s an activity where you can compete against others, all the better—thank your ruling planet, Mars, for your competitive drive.
Taurus, your earth element and ruling planet Venus imbue you with a love for all things that tickle the senses. Indulge in a multi-course tasting menu at a restaurant, suggests Lettman. You’ll appreciate the pomp and circumstance of the parade of dishes, and it’s a chance to dress up for the night. “It would push you outside of your comfort zone to take yourself to a restaurant, but once you’re there, you’ll really enjoy being waited on and wined and dined,” she says. Save room for dessert.
Thank your ruling planet Mercury and your air element for your gift of the gab and curiosity, Gemini. Make your next solo date “something where your mind is piqued and educated, and where you can have conversations with people,” says Gailing. Get yourself a ticket to an author talk, film discussion, or podcast taping you’d enjoy.
You live for comfort, Cancer, and cooking and eating nourishing meals warms your soul, so why not learn how to prepare your own? For your next solo date, Gailing suggests enrolling in a cooking class. Pick your favorite cuisine, and learn how to make a couple dishes. Not keen to get your hands dirty? Fulfill your foodie side with less mess by strolling to your local fancy market and creating your own picnic spread to enjoy at a park.
Your creativity is boundless, Leo—thank your fire sign energy for that. For your next solo date, Gailing recommends you seek out “something that evokes your own inner artist, and gives it a stage upon which to express itself.” Book a session at a painting or pottery studio to get your creative juices flowing. All the better if it’s a group class—your outgoing spirit and confidence make it easy for you to make new friends, says Lettman.
Your sign is associated with the harvest, Virgo, and your earth sign placement bolsters your appreciation and love for all things green. Make a trip to your local botanical garden or flower show your next solo date, says Gailing. Pick out a beautiful bouquet or smart succulent for yourself on the way out, or just take home some serious inspiration for your home plant-scaping pursuits.
Your ruling planet Venus informs your love for all that’s luxe and beautiful, Libra, and your solo date should include that same energy. Book yourself a solo afternoon tea at a ritzy hotel, suggests Gailing. Bring a book, and look for a locale with an especially sumptuous interior you can admire as you nibble on dainty bites and people watch.
It’s time for you to check in for your solo date, Scorpio—to a hotel, that is. Lettman recommends booking a one night stay at a local hotel where you can truly have some relaxing alone time. You approach all aspects of your life with intensity and vigor—your ruling planet Pluto, plus your water element, are to thank—so why not take your relaxation and fun as seriously? Fall off the map for a night, order room service, take a soothing bubble bath, put on the hotel robe, and settle in for a relaxing evening of you time.
You can’t be tied down, Sagittarius, so your next solo date should be a mini day trip. Your ruling planet Jupiter’s association with expansion bestows you with your insatiable wanderlust, and your fire element lends you the independence to fulfill it. This time though, says Gailing, stick closer to home and plan a mini trip nearby for a change of pace.“Even if it’s just going two hours away, you’re getting out of dodge and feeling a sense of expanded potential,” says Gailing. Depending on where you reside, maybe you’re a short train trip or drive away from a winery or a nearby theme park, or a cute small town. Head out for an afternoon and explore.
Capricorn, you are a person who appreciates quality and luxury, and you have a deep reverence for history and culture. Depending on your tastes, Lettman and Gailing recommend you treat yourself to a cultural excursion that piques your interest, like an exhibition or performance. Dress up for a night at the opera or ballet, or treat yourself to a nice breakfast followed by a solo stroll around a museum where you’ll have plenty of informative placards to read and audio tours to listen to.
You’re known as the friend of the zodiac, Aquarius, and you find joy and some peace by giving back to others. Volunteering in your community, for example at a soup kitchen or animal shelter, and contributing to the common good fulfills your deeply altruistic nature, says Lettman. Sign up for a volunteer shift for an afternoon and help with a cause you care about.
For your next solo date, Pisces, give yourself the space and time to truly unwind. As the zodiac’s empath, you need time to soothe your endless depths. What better way to do that than with some special pampering? Lettman recommends a spa day for you, complete with the works. Think: soaking pools, treatments, massages, manicures and pedicures, cucumbers on the eyes, and soothing music.
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